CONFIRMING YOUR MENTAL HEALTH BEFORE ENTERING A RELATIONSHIP

Prior to entering a relationship, it is essential that you put some measures in place that would ensure your relationship does not hit the rocks. One of which is your mental health which needs to be stable for your relationship to progress.

Mental health is one aspect of health that people do not really pay attention to. They give more attention to their physical health than mental health, without realizing that the two of them go hand-in-hand.

Advisably, people who have mental health are advised not to enter a relationship. The reason for this is it is difficult for them to give their all to the relationship without encountering tough and challenging times.

For instance, someone who is suffering from depression would not make a relationship fun-filled as it should be.

Hence, it is suitable to sort out yourself before committing to a partner, it saves you lots of challenges that you might face in your relationship.

There is one way to know if you have a mental health problem. If you observe and see that you exhibit behaviors that is beyond the normal, then you might be showing signs of a possible mental health problem.

Thankfully, there are proficient treatment for mental health problems that aim to put your life back on track. And it is best that from time to time, check on your health by seeing a medical practitioner who would be able to detect if you have an underlying mental health problem or not.

If you are verified to have a mental health problem, there is no need to fret. The best step to take is to follow the directives of your health care provider. With time, you will be glad to discover that the state of your mental health is better than before.

Starting from the counseling stage, you will discover the root cause of your mental health and you will have a more directional sense of purpose.  

HOW ADDICTION RUINS RELATIONSHIPS

Addiction negatively impacts everything around an individual, including their relationships. One common symptom of an individual’s addiction is their lying and denial attitude, and they cannot be blamed for this.

It is a common practice for people who are addicted to receive lots of criticisms from those who are not addicted.

Hence, addicted individuals would rather remain in their addiction than open up to people because of the way people would treat them. For people in relationships, it is usually tough when addiction is in the picture.

If one of the duo is addicted and the other is not, it is usually difficult for both of them to agree on lots of things. It could get worse if the addiction begins to rub off on the person who is not addicted.

It could also go the other way round because the person who is not addicted might try to convince the addicted person to quit their addiction.

With addiction in a relationship, there is a likely chance for distrust to enter, particularly when the addicted individual refuses to tell the other of their addiction problem.

The addicted individual then begins to hide things from their partner and this causes conflicts in the relationship, making it a recurring event.

The worst case scenario is when both parties are addicted. When this happens, it is very difficult for either of them to let go of their addiction problem.

Addiction finds strength in unity and when two lovers are addicted, they would refute the opinion of everyone around them who is trying to convince them to quit.

These lovers would spend a lot on their addiction and it begins to reflect in their finances. If both of them are jointly hooked on both drug and alcohol addiction, they could become broke if care is not taken.

It is needed to seek help when any form of addiction is in the picture, because of the varying adverse effects that they come with.  

EFFECTS OF SUBSTANCE ADDICTION ON A RELATIONSHIP

When an individual is hooked on addiction, the crave for alcohol and drugs never seems to die down, and this intense need has the ability to trump the love which they have for everything. It first starts with an innocent use for either drugs or alcohol, and before they know it, using this substance becomes topmost priority, and hence causing a strain on those they love.

Addiction has the capacity to greatly change the personality of an individual, making them different from who they used to be before they got addicted. They become more withdrawn to themselves, and because of shame and guilt, they become more secretive.

There are three major effects which substance addiction has on a relationship, and they are as follows:

  • Trust fades off: When the addiction phase is in progress, trust begins to decline, and this is due to the fact that the addicted person begins to hide things from their partner, and begin to give all sorts of excuses for their uncalled-for behaviour. Trust is a necessary ingredient in a relationship, and once it is strained, it would be hard to fix because it induces feelings of jealousy and fear.
  • Unstable Emotional levels: When you are in a relationship with a person who has an addiction, it can be likened to being in a vehicle, taking down rough terrains and smooth ones alike. There are times when they would feel good, and other times, they would feel otherwise. They are usually very volatile, and their lives are contained with erratic lows and highs, which could induce violence in a relationship. This is usually due to the fact that they are unable to see beyond the choices which the substance gives them.
  • Affects those around them: Asides the fact that it affects both parties in a relationship, addiction also has the capacity to affect people around them. It would be difficult for them to maintain a good communication level with people close to them.

If you are in a relationship with an addict, it is best to assist them in seeking help, so that they can break free from it, before it adversely affects your relationship.

RELATIONSHIP WITH A RECOVERING ADDICT


Addicts that are undergoing therapy for recovery have taken time to actually work on themselves, and their relationship with other people. Hence, they are not new to keeping and sustaining relationships. They have studied, and are vast in good relationship skills which includes the ability to communicate how they feel about others, while respecting the limits set by them.
Recovering addicts do not look for aptness and perfection in their partners because, they have come to understand that such things does not exist. They are ready to accept the flaws that their partners have and try to live in harmony with it. They also have a sense of commitment to stand for their values, and they strive for integrity and uprightness in all of their dealings especially relationship wise.
In recovery, a lot of things are learnt by an addict and not just staying in a state of soberness and deep reflection, but also learn to lead a happy and fulfilling life. The concept of recovery is the one that lasts throughout the life of the addict and as such, there is always an attempt for self-improvement at each phase of their lives. Regardless of the fact that they might have not have experienced a smooth past, they still stand as people who you can live and partner with.
There are some important steps a recovering addict must take to become ready relationship wise. First, the recovering addict must have undergone consistent and intentional act of sobriety and abstinence in other to have a clear mind void of distractions and temptations.
Also, they should engage themselves in recovery activities like actively involving themselves in various programs or duties that can keep them busy. Volunteering to serve in events is also one way they can engage themselves. All these activities would prepare them for the people they want to go into a relationship with, and as well build the assurance level of their partners with the faith they are going into a relationship with people that are responsible.
Similarly, it is important for anyone going into a relationship with a recovering addict, to have a clear conscience about it. Research has shown that people tend to have a negative disposition to addicts, and judge them starkly even more than those suffering from other issues like obesity, and other body and health disorders. Hence, if a person is of the view and opinion that addiction is a huge flaw for anyone experiencing it, it is better to abstain from addicts then.